The stupider people think you are, they more surprised they will be when you kill them.

Q: OiBoy22: What does being an OiBoy mean to you?

A: RidgeDogg: That the OiBoys to me represent a symptom of the sickness in our society and the Rich White Ghetto (suburbia) we live in along with MTV, Coca Cola, Tommy Hilfiger, Televangelists, and Police Brutality.

Q: OiBoy22: What's your full name?

A: RidgeDogg: John Ethridge Zackary

Q: OiBoy22: Why do you rule so much?

A: RidgeDogg: Let me count the ways....for one, I can spit in the air and catch my own loogie, and I've seen all of the planet of the apes movies.

Q: OiBoy22: Where were you born?

A: RidgeDogg: Madrid, Spain. 1811

Q: OiBoy22: What is your favorite color?

A: RidgeDogg: On a lady?

Q: OiBoy22: What is the square root of 225?

A: RidgeDogg: Square roots are an abstract idea and I refuse to answer them.

Q: OiBoy22: How short are you?

A: RidgeDogg: Where?

Q: OiBoy22: What is your viewpoint on the US government?

A: RidgeDogg: They are better than the socialists bastards who write "physco hose beast"....I hate them both.

Q: OiBoy22: Date of birth?

A: RidgeDogg: 12-4-81

Q: OiBoy22: Have you ever been harased by the cops for the way you dress?

A: RidgeDogg: No, I haven't but they don't like the pipe bombs in my trunk.

Q: OiBoy22: sXe?

A: RidgeDogg: No

Q: OiBoy22: What do you want to say to all those crazy broads that want to have your baby?

A: RidgeDogg: As beautiful as my children would be, don't fall in love with me. I will break your heart everytime, and besides, to sleep with me is 20 bucks.

[interupted for a phone call. After a bunch of small talk, I told him I would call him back later]

Q: OiBoy22: Why the H-E-double hockey sticks does Sean call so much?

A: RidgeDogg: Because he has nothing else to do between the random beatings his parents administer to him.

[another stupid phone call interupts us]

Q: RidgeDogg as OiBoy22: Why do I like men?

A: RidgeDogg: I think its because of your upbringing, I mean look at your mom, WHAT A SLUT! I can understand your desperate plea for attention.

[Brian returns from his phone call]

[Other phone line rings, and rings, and rings]

OiBoy22: I hate you.

A: RidgeDogg: I wish you weren't so homophobic.

[Brian gets up and leaves the room]

Q: Marshmallow Man: [after some cursing and commotion, ridge gets out of the comfortable chair] What is your favorite type of candy?

A: RidgeDogg: The hot momma, Candi from work!

Q: Marshmallow Man: Speaking of work what is your viewpoint on the workforce of america?

A: RidgeDogg: I can't think of anything to say without sounding like a socialist. So long live the bourgouise!

Q: Marshmallow Man: If you were stranded on a desert island what slut would you like to be stranded with?

A: RidgeDogg: I don't go for sluts, I think it is duragatory to use that. But if you mean woman then it would have to be...That roadie who sold merchandise for Bad Religion. She was hot!! Course my glasses were broken but she still looks pretty cute.

Q: Marshmallow Man: Do you ever feel oppressed by the government?

A: RidgeDogg: No, um, I don't feel that the government is out to get me or anything like that, and I have all the freedoms I want and without them sites like and punk rock in general would be impossible.

Q: Marshmallow Man: Do you believe in true love? For a single person only.

A: RidgeDogg: I don't know, but I hope there is. Because life is never that easy.

Q: Marshmallow Man: Why did you insist on being interviewed while the Descendants are playing?

A: RidgeDogg: I want to classified, I want to be stereotyped, I want a suburban home!!

Q: Marshmallow Man: Final Question, Are you ready?

A: RidgeDogg: Yes I am, Thanks for your time.

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