Crap Jokes: Sex: At the Sex Clinic


The couple visited a sex clinic to complain that their sex life had
become a bore.

Each night, the man would arrive home. His wife would prepare supper.
After supper, they'd watch two hours of television. Immediately
afterwards, they would go to bed. From that point on, every move was
routine.

"No wonder," the sex therapist said. "You've made sex monotonous. Stop
living on a schedule. Get into sex whenever you feel like it. Don't
wait until bedtime each night to do it. Do it whenever you get into
the mood."

The couple agreed to try the advice. They returned the following week.

"How did things work out?" the sex therapist asked.

The man and his wife were beaming. "It worked! It worked great!!!"

"Tell me about it," said the therapist.

"Well, two nights after we saw you last, we were eating supper when I
noticed that although it was only seven o'clock, I had this huge
erection that was unstoppable. Sweetie pie here was staring at it
with longing eyes. So I didn't wait for any shower or any news
broadcast. Instead, I reached out, ripped off her blouse and bra, then
tore off her panties. I flung her right onto the table, spilling all
the wine and soup in the process. Then I unzipped and we had sex like
we've never had it before!"

"That's wonderful!" said the sex therapist. "I told you it would work
if you did it when the spirit moved you!"

"Only one thing," said the man a little sadly. "They're not ever going
to let us go back to that restaurant."
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