... POOR IDEAS FOR GENUTAINMENT TV SHOWS:
10. Police, Camera, Christopher Biggins!
9. When Shopkeepers Fall Over!
8. Police, Camera, Littering!
7. When Animals Get Bored!
6. Police, Camera, Another Camera!
5. When Fat People Get Stuck In Lifts!
4. Police, Camera, Sack Race!
3. When Vicars Choke!
2. Police, Camera, Pub Crawl!
1. When Fridges Defrost!
... THINGS WOMEN SHOULD NOT SAY ON A FIRST DATE:
10. Technically, I still love Simon Le Bon.
9. Will you marry me?
8. Cats are more intelligent than men.
7. I might as well tell you now - I suffer from terrible fanny farts.
6. I used to be a man.
5. I was drunk when I got here.
4. Even the thought of oral sex turns my stomach.
3. I must've slept with over four hundred men.
2. I hate my hairy arse. It's so unwomanly.
1. Shall we get the money out of the way now?
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