GATES IN HELL
The US Justice Department - unable to sentence Bill Gates to any
meaningful economic fine decided that his punishment would be more
severe - and sentenced him to eternity in Hell.
Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This
will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy, and a
big liar all your life. Frankly releasing Windows 95 two years early,
would by itself, have landed you here. But enough of that. You've
arrived on a day when I'm in a good mood, so I'll be generous and give
you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever."
Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor
souls are being tormented and tortured.
He then takes him to a massive colliseum where thousands of people are
being chased and devoured by starving lions.
Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a beautiful
young woman with an alluring look on her face sat across a four-poster
bed, a bottle of the finest wine chilling in an ice-bucket on a table
next to it, and, to Bill's delight, a PC in the corner.
Without hesitation thinking he outsmatred the devil, Bill says, "I'll
take this option."
"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan then locks
the door.
As Satan turns around, he bumps into Lucifer. "That was Bill Gates!"
cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best room in the house?"
"That's what everyone thinks," sniggered Satan. "The vintage bottle of
wine you see - it has a hole in it. And that beautiful young lady -
she doesn't."
"What about the PC?"
"Oh, If you look carefully, you'll see that it crashed," replied
Satan. "And it's missing three keys."
"Which three?"
"Control, Alt, and Delete."
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