Mail us! image (c) Kitty Roach
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Expressions for High Stress
You - Off my planet - Now!
Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
Well, this day was a total waste of aftershave / perfume.
When I am blamed I delegate
I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 33 years.
Allow me to introduce my selves.
…..A couple of bricks short of a house?
Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
I'm just working here until a good fast-food job opens up.
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
I'm trying to imagine me with a personality.
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realise you weren't asleep
I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
You say I'm a b***** like it's a bad thing.
Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?
Nice expression. Must you marinate in it?
Earth is full. Go home.
What damage can we do today?
Is it time for your medication or mine?
How do I set a laser printer to stun?
I'm not tense, just very, very alert.
I’m not confused!
Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...
I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
How about never? Is never good for you?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...?
Do I look like a people person?
This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
How do I set a laser printer to stun?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
No, my powers can only be used for good.
You sound reasonable.....time to up my medication.
Who me? I just wander from room to room.
My toys, my toys! I can't work without my toys.
Well, aren't we just a ray of freakin' sunshine?
I pretend to work - they pretend to pay me.
Practice random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control.
I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes.
Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
How many times do I have to flush before you go away?
Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?
When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
And my motto...
Chaos, panic, and disorder--my work here is done.
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