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2. All beds have special
L-shaped top sheets which reach up to armpit level on a
woman but only to waist
level on the man lying beside her.
3. It’s easy for anyone
to land a plane providing there is someone in the
control tower to talk
you down.
4. A man will show no
pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will
wince when a woman tries
to clean his wounds.
5. Large loft-style apartments
in New York City are well within the price range
of most people - whether
they are employed or not.
6. Even when driving down
a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the
steering wheel vigorously
from left to right every few moments.
7. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
8. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
9. If you decide to start
dancing in the street everyone you bump into will know
all the steps.
10. Should you decide
to defuse a bomb don’t worry which wire to cut. You will
always choose the right
one.
11. Most laptop computers
are powerful enough to override the communications
system of any invading
alien society.
12. Extremely beautiful
and intelligent women are likely to become prostitutes
or welders.
13. It does not matter
if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving
martial arts, your enemies
will wait patiently to attack you one by one by
dancing around in a threatening
manner until you have knocked out their
predecessors.
14. When you turn out
the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will
still be clearly visible,
just slightly bluish.
15. Police departments
give their officers personality tests to make sure they
are deliberately assigned
to a partner who is their total opposite.
16. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
17. Radiation causes interesting
mutations - not to your future children but to
you, right there and
then.
18. If you are blonde
and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on
nuclear fission at the
age of 22.
19. Honest and hard working
policemen are traditionally gunned down three days
before their retirement.
20.
Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies
using complicated machinery
involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses,
lasers and man eating
sharks which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes
to escape.
