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WORK IN PROGRESS
III
The incessant rattle got to Jhana as much as her dreaded prescription.
A Chinese medic had given her a stenchy concoction of miscelanious herbs to
help aliviate her addiction, but in truth the nausiatingly sickly taste of the
pungent homemade pills would have turned her back to the coke with open
arms had she not by this juncture already summoned the willpower to reject
such defeatist tactics. But that didn't make the whole thing easy. Worse still
that her surroundings contnually reminded her of darker times. Faces and
issues she associated with things that terrorfied her now, but which for some
unknown reason she had formerlly revelled in. The withdrawal symptoms
remained; not least the gaunt, hollow feelings that something was missing;
her mind acclimatising to an umfamiliar environment. She had passed the
stage where she wanted to go back, which was why her sympathetic but
often tested big brother was taking her away.
Through the intricate cobweb design of the dark but no less artistic
makeup around her eyes, she watched the reflections of the train wheels
spinning frantically away like a child transfixed by the motion of a passing
automobile. Jyishu had fought through the dosile ques in the buffet car to get
them both piping cardboard cups of coffee which scourched his fingers as he
jogged along the carriageway in a vain attempt to hand the things over to his
sister before his burns required immediate medical attention, pondering
angrily why by now nobody had come up with an absorbing synthetic which
could plausably keep the heat in the cup.
"No thanks, Jish." That was like a damsel in distress kicking the knight
in the teeth after he'd just slain the proverbial dragon. She rubbed her head
vicorously as if it was a thick coconut plucked from a desert island tree which
somehow managed to resist any attempts to release it's contents for human
consumption as Jyishu sat down wearily promising himself that even now he
had to drink both cups he wouldn't become an addict himself. "Headache,
huh?" There was a hint of genuine concern in his tone, aside from
the obvious sarcasm. Jhana had been through enough heartache, not to
mention headache, this last year, and he really should have been more
understanding, but being the head of the house, he'd also had to put up with
her bitching while she was on the crack, not to mention the sulking and the
stealing. Afterall, it was her fault she'd got into the stuff in the first place, but
family is family, and she was a lot better now she was trying; now she'd
conquored a few ghosts. He felt sorry for her really; she was at least a sad
case in a more sympathetic way than she was before, and it had been his idea
to give her a change of scenary.
The bullet train ran from Goa all the way through India and the golden
triangle and ending up at the South China Sea. It was really the lazy hiker's
solution to the gratuatous new age pilgrimage; if you took the trip in reverse.
Goa was where all the dissillusioned and disenfranchised victims of corporate
economics ended up; a safe haven for those determined to lead a communal,
quasi-spiritual, minimalist life. It was truly one of the last pillars of 'the simple
life', although it was carefully marketed as such; cleverly mixing ideology and
profiteering in order to scramble together maximum monetary spoils. They
had got on in Shwebo; their home town, which in contrast was ravished with
poverty, although when it came to recreational drugs, Goa possesed the
superior market.
Across the carriage, Yamyang thumbed a small volume of carfully inked
scripture scrawled from what Westerners would see as bottom to top of the
page in his native Tibetan. He paused for a moment as a strange sensation
not dissimilar to a passive electrical surrent passing through the body caused
him to look up from his studies and gaze around. The origin of the
disturbance had gone by the time his wyes had left the sutras, but he was
persuaded by something deep and meaningful that there were spiritual
connotations to this brief experience.
If Jhana was on a journey of self rediscovery, Yamyang could be said
to have been on one in whoich he intended to transcend the self.
Like most incarnate lamas, Yamyang had devoted his existence to monestary
life; to self cultivation; the real religious life those who frequented
the Western mystical pleasure domes of Goa would rather take a tantalising
pinch of than a saintly morsel. Then again, each to his own. Yamyang knew
monastic life didn't suit everybody, and whatever you did, you should always
go with what you feel is right.
As the lofty hills of the Shan Plateau sneaked into view on the outskirts
of her field of vision, Jhana pressed her head against the calm, cold double
thick window which vehemently kept all the clanking, whizzing sounds of
travel outside, and breathed a lengthy sigh of relief as the welcome freeze
provided a far more savoury aphrodisiac. "Thanks, Yish." Her brother
nodded; unseen; he'd already burned his tounge finishing off the first coffee,
fearing the steady motion of the speeding vehicle might slouch unnaniunced
into sloppiness and cause him to spill it over his best work suit. Though his
manly demenour wouldn't allow him to acknowledge it publically, he heartily
appreciated her thanks. He loved his sister really, even if she was...
'Christ, Jyishu; you're getting soft in your old age' He punished
himself with another deadly sip from the remaining cup, while Jhana dropped
steadily into an almost unconsciouss sleep which was highly preferable to the
literal nightmare dreams often offered her. She was prone to lapse into
obscure spiritual trances; to hallucinate; to fall into zombie like fits of blank
depression which she could hardly recall after the event, which made her
eternally greatful to the little family she had for sticking by her over. It was
difficult for her, but she couldn't run away from it. It must have been
difficult for Jish, too, and he could have ran away. He never had. She
left the trembling window to its own mechanical devices and leant her head
on her brother's shoulder instead and tried abortively to smile. She was
smiling inside, at least, which for a manic depressive was a good sign. Perhaps
his idea of altering her surroundings was to be a good one. Jyishu, in
response, brushed aside the clumsy collection of silvery gothic trinkets which
Jhana's petit and eternally aching head and neck should not logically have
been able to hold as they dug like rows of impaling stakes into his flesh and
watched the black clad teenager drift into an easy sleep she had better enjoy
because tommorow would bring its own repatative testa for her, and it wasn't
often she could enjoy such things the way her head thumped and pounded
like a box of fireworks lit from inside by a dastadly match. He had spent a lot
of time on his sister recently; he'd taken a lot of abuse, and though it got to
him at times, he'd never let it show; never let it break onto the surface,
because she was sensitive even when she was being self centred, and if he let
it boil over it wouldn't help her. He'd gone out of his way every day of his life
since mum died, and the drugs thing had been hell on earth, but as all the
good doctors said, there's light at the end of the tunnel. That was a potent
metaphor given that here they were; bound for salvation, he hoped; on the
old uprooted Japanese bullet train. Jyishu skillfully concealed a cheeky
manouver to drop the second bubbling coffe cup into a nearby trash can and
praised whatever gods may or may not exist that at least today would pass
without unwanted incident. Jhana was getting over her problems, which
meant mabye at last he could get onto his; his spurned carrer, his sacrificed
relationships, the basic, everyday things most people took for granted.
Whatever small ammounts of money he had went on aiding his sister; every
waking hour of every day. His only hobbies and recreations were ones of her
preference, he only went out where she wanted to go out, and he
only slept when she had already entered that unfettered realm. He comforted
himself in her apparent comfort. The world's true heros are often
unsung.
CHARACTER PORTRAITS FOR CHARACTERS FROM 'THE COMPENDIUM'
Mail me at gabriel.hartnell@virgin.net
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